Monday, October 27, 2008

Partly Cloudy with a chance of Bloodshed

Today did not start well. Any day you get out of bed groaning that it's only Monday and there are 5 days of near-hell ahead of you seems to indicate that things may not go totally well. I am far behind on grading, which means I can't craft, (although clearly I make no such distinction for blogging...er...yes....well....) so I am kind of stressed. There is a purse living in my head that hasn't been born yet and it's driving me kind of crazy. I am making all my Christmas presents this year, and so far, I have only finished 2.

So before 1st period, as I am frantically running around trying to breathe life into the copy machine, I run into my favorite substitute. Those of you who do not teach, a good sub is worth their weight in gold. A good sub knows the kids, will do what you ask, and not spend the day playing games on the computer whilst the kids systematically dismantle the classroom. I asked, halfway jokingly, if she was free tomorrow, and SHE WAS. So I claimed her, called in "sick" tomorrow, and I'M PLAYING HOOKY!!!!!

Although....is it still playing hooky if you grade papers all day? I say yes...if you are grading papers while in your pajamas. Which I will be.

To make sure that I really didn't miss the kids, all day long, they whined and complained, and then in 6th period....I nearly came apart at the seams, and was really quite close to clawing my own eyes out. Two of the most immature boys in that class decided to open class by....can you guess? I bet you can't. You'll never guess, so I'll tell you. I have a red and white rug that is about 4x6, and it covers up the cords to the very expensive digital projector. One of them, and I don't know which one, decided to throw the rug at the head of the other one. And the other one, threw it back. This is about the point that I saw this (I am supposed to stand in the hall before class starts) and the conversation went something like this:

Me: WHAT ARE YOU DOING???????????????
Them: Miss, but, he threw.....
Me: THAT IS NOT THE ANSWER I WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Them: But Miss...
Me: NO. YOU DO NOT SCREW AROUND BY THE PROJECTOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IS THAT CLEAR???????????????
Them: But he started it!
Me: THAT IS NOT THE ANSWER I AM LOOKING FOR. YOU SAY, "YES MA'AM" AND THEN STOP TALKING.
Them: But...
Me: NO. SAY YES MA'AM AND THEN STOP TALKING.
Them: But...
REST OF CLASS: JUST SAY YES MA'AM AND SHUT UP!!!!!!!

Honestly. I never thought I would have to write that my day ended with children throwing RUGS at each other. Then, I saw one of my principals at the soccer game, and was telling him who was in that class and he couldn't stop laughing at my bad luck. Nice.

I'm sleeping in tomorrow....and then shall be visiting my therapists, Ben and Jerry.

3 comments:

Just say Julie said...

I think I threw in a few gratuitas adjectives. And I am still crying from laughing at this and the message you left for me. I would love to call in tomorrow, but it's jump off a bus day and the legislature says I have to be there to sign off on my students knowing the correct way to evacuate a bus in the event of an accident. It's not like I have to teach or anything.

Bethany Haile Photography said...

:( I'm sorry you are not having fun! I really am glad that you get the day off...seriously. I didn't want to read anything disturbing in the news!
Hope tomorrow is a relaxing day for you...after you finish your grading that is!

TattooedMinivanMom said...

Those "therapists" are in high demand.